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I love fangs. One might say that I have a Vampyre Fetish. After my divorce, I went through a kind of a "mid-life crisis". I completely reinvented myself. I started going to Goth Clubs and hanging out with a "dark" crowd. The deeper I got into the lifestyle, the more I found myself longing for fangs. I had tried many of the ones that you can purchase in a costume shop. Was never pleased with the fit or functionality of any of them. So, I sought the help of a friend. This friend of mine made custom fit fangs out of dental acrylic. I drove 40 miles, one way, to his house, where he took an impression of my teeth. We then sat and discussed, at length, the style that I was looking for. I eventually decided on a set of upper doubles. That means that two teeth on each side of the top would be turned into fangs (the canines and the incisors) for a total of four teeth. Then, he told me the price. I just about fell to the floor... $250!!!
Well, I wanted them so badly that I counted out $250 in cash (I went prepared) and handed it to him. He told me he would call me in about a week to come get them. A week went by with no phone call, so I called him. "They're not ready yet. Call me in a few days." It would be another week before they were ready. When I went to get them and have the final adjustments made, they really did not fit as well as I had hoped. He was not pleased with them either, so he took another mold and started the process over. It was another week before the second set was ready. To make a really long story long, I did finally get the finished set, but they still were not what I wanted. Since I had already racked up 240 miles, I was tired of it all. So I took that set and was off. They were not as long or as sharp as I had really wanted, they felt loose on my teeth and I had a TERRIBLE lisp. Let me just tell you that a lisping Vampyre is humorous rather than fierce. I had absolutely no knowledge of dentistry, BUT, I did have basic knowledge of acrylic fingernails and using a Dremel. How difficult could it be? I decided I would try it myself. After making countless phone calls to find a dental supplier and figuring out what I needed, I was able to obtain all the tools. It wasn't cheap, or easy, but I am hard headed and when I put my mind to something, I get it done. To my surprise, I WAS able to make a set of fangs. They weren't very good. The colour was off, they were uneven and they didn't seem to want to stay on my teeth. But hey, it was my first attempt. I spent MUCH more time on the second set. I got a better colour match and I was meticulous about the shaping. Guess what! PERFECT! See top photo on the left. They are cracked and stained now, but were awesome in their day. I started making many more sets for myself and for friends. Even some for people that I did not know. I always wore mine to the club that I went to and I was always getting comments on them, so that drove business. Best of all, I was charging less than half of what my so-called friend charged me. (He was not real happy with me about that) Since I don't get out much anymore (single mom ya know) to meet new people and everyone in my circle that wants fangs has them, I decided to try them mail order. That is where I stand right now. I want to try them, but I have yet to get a victim. If you want to become my guinea pig, read on.
Prices start at just $70 per set. Upper teeth are $35 per tooth. (Two top teeth, $70. Four top teeth, $140.) Lower teeth are $40 per tooth. (Two bottom teeth, $80. Four bottom teeth, $160.) Group discounts available. Ask about how to host a Fang Party and get a FREE set of fangs.
*** NOTE *** These fangs are for novelty only. I do not condone biting anyone with them and I DEFINITELY do not encourage vampirism (the drinking of blood). Both are very dangerous and just stupid. Biting someone can cause a small piece of acrylic to become lodged in them and enter their bloodstream causing all kinds of health problems. The drinking of blood... well, DUH! There are WAY too many diseases out there that are transmitted through the blood to be messing around with that (can we say AIDS). Again, these are NOVELTY ONLY and I am not liable for any injury, illness, dental problems, plague, Act of God(dess), swarm of locust, solar eclipse or anything else that may arise from the use or misuse of the fangs. Wear them at your own risk. By purchasing fangs you agree to release me from all responsibility of any and all damages. If you live in South Florida, e-mail me and we will see about getting together so that I can we can do this in person (which is easier for me). If you do not live near me, read the following VERY CAREFULLY as this is REALLY REALLY important. I am not responsible for fangs that do not fit due to failure to follow these steps EXACTLY. First, go to your dentist and have them make a mold of your upper and lower teeth from dental stone or plaster. This mold must be an EXACT replica of your teeth and be trimmed and free of imperfections. And it must be current (do not send me a mold from when you got your braces off six years ago). I will be making the fangs to fit the mold so if it isn't right, your fangs will probably not fit your real teeth. Second, ask your dentist for a "shade button" (a small piece of acrylic matching the colour of your teeth) or the "Jet Shade" prescription (your dentist will know what that means). I prefer the shade button, but either is fine. Third, CAREFULLY package your mold, the shade button (or Jet
Shade prescription), the completed
Fang Order Form and payment (via Postal Money Order) if not paying via PayPal,
in a good strong box with lots of padding. Newspaper makes a great, cheap packing
material. I recommend sending them via Priority Mail. You can go to your local
Post Office and ask them for a box (size #04 would work great). They will GIVE
you one. All you have to do is pay the Priority Mail Postage. It should be under
one pound, so the postage will only be $3.85. If it is over a pound, the postage
will vary from $3.95-$5.75 depending on your location. But I really think it
will be under a pound. I DO recommend insurance on it as you will have to pay
your dentist for the mold and if it gets broken in the mail, I cannot make the
fangs. Do NOT send them via UPS or FedEx. Send them to: |
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